Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Seems like the only really bad thing about not having hockey anymore is the lack of an excuse! To things like not studying, feeling tired... There's no more "training just now, sleep luh now". So it's like, if I go to bed real early 'cos I really want to, there's this huge guilt that I have. Plus the fact I'll feel sleepy in class regardless of the time I sleep the night before, it just adds up to a bunch of bullshit.
It's around 6 months to the 'A' Levels. I remembered I did say once I never wanted A'Divs to end, 'cos after A'Divs would be 'A's and after 'A's would be army. So yeah I kinda did not want JC life to end, so quickly. (C'mon it's already coming to May!). 3/8 of JC2 is over already. Now my thoughts aren't really that I'm lovin' JC so much that I don't want it to end, but I wouldn't really dread that time is running out for my Pre-U education. It wouldn't pain me if JC would end very soon. Maybe the hockey, the memories, the friends I've made would be the biggest miss, but the academics and everything, although refreshing and new compared to secondary school, is starting to be a bit of the pain in the ass and I really want to like sleep and chill for one full week. No school, nothing.
You may say, how 'bout June holidays? There's 4 weeks to choose from. Well, once I let up on one week for studying, I'll basically be screwed for 'A's. So yah, there's no respite until December. That thought, is just so so tiring to think of. And now I even feel guilty for being on the comp now, even just one night. That's what stress does to you, makes you think, hard, about yourself and what you're doing.
This sucks.
I still enjoy going to school. The fun and everything. The laughter. But all this are just secondary when you compare to the end goal everyone has in their own minds.
Bye.
my thoughts at 9:43 pm